Either I need to start taking care of my car more or my car has a vendetta against me… maybe a little bit of both? I now have an air leak in one tire and my drivers door jams and wont close, you slam it and if your not careful it bounces back and hits you in the gut. It’s only 3 years old!
I took my car to Canadian Tire to get it fixed yesterday and walked out without getting it fixed. They wanted change a bunch of parts that didn’t need changing (although the way it is going I am sure they will need to be soon) and wanted to charge me for 3 hours of work cause their “book” says so… A mechanic my dad knows says it shouldn’t take more then an hour and that half the stuff they wanted to “fix” had nothing to do with the fuel system and did not need to be touched.
So my mother is driving my father up to the city tomorrow to get my car and take it back to Digby so he can have it fixed down there by someone he trusts. I just hope that the guys not wrong and doesn’t end up having to replace all that the other mechanic says plus we have to pay for the gas from Halifax to Digby. Since it’s leaking gas that might get quite expensive, not to mention if the damn thing breaks down half way there and has to be towed the rest of the way.
It’s so frustrating. I just want to get rid of the damn thing. But I will never get enough out of it to cover the loan so I am stuck with it.
So tomorrow will be the end of my second week back to work and the start of my 6 hour shifts. It went pretty well. I do find I am exhausted and go home and nap after work now. So I can only image what next week and the one after will be like, especially since Tuesday I have two tests at the hospital and will need to take the bus there and back. I have not taken the bus in years! I’m a little anxious about it. I hate buses.
I decided to add some more to this. People are starting to notice my lack of co-ordination at work and comment on it. Since only one person knows exactly what’s going on it’s kind of embarrassing but at the same time I don’t want to tell everyone. Another thing I have noticed is that I am having issues with thinking clearly. Cognitive type issues.
I get frustrated because I have a hard time sorting out my thoughts. By that I mean if I am handling a tech support problem I know the process and they steps they want us to follow and we even have “troubleshooting trees”, however I can read through it and it just doesn’t sink in. And when I actually have to explain it in my own words to a customer then I am getting them, and myself confused. It’s really hard. I don’t want it to affect my work but it is.
I need to talk to my doctor about it but he always has the “if you can’t do it then don’t” attitude and I don’t really like that. I would much rather work on it and even figure out other ways to do it or learn it or whatever. I’ve never felt so frustrated with things in my life.
On top of that I got a call the other day from the ENT office. They are trying to find a medication that will help with everything and some of them are technically anti-anxiety, anti-depression medications. The way he worded it in the office was that he wanted me to speak to someone at the mental health department to help figure out what to do about the side effects of the medications are they would be the best ones suited to it. So he was going to put in a referral. I got a call the other day and the way the receptionist worded it was “You’ll need to call mental health to have them help you with your depression and anxiety and all that, they want you to call them yourself”.
I was a little taken aback by it because that was not the reason I am being put on it. And just the way she said it made me a little mad. I don’t really know why. I have dealt with both depression and anxiety in the past. I also don’t believe it completely leaves you. In fact I believe its sort of always there in just about everyone and just certain things trigger it or bring it out in one way or another. Some more serious then others.
But just the way the meds were explained to me it was to help with a neurological issue not a mental health issue. Though I guess they kinda go hand in hand for the most part as people with neurological problems are at higher risk then other people.
Maybe I am just looking to far into this…