I really don’t like insomnia…

I’m really having an issue with not being tired, despite the fact I had next to no sleep last night and was at the hospital all day today with Cory. I just can’t sleep. I don’t even feel tired at all. Compared to a someone that 3 months ago could never make it past 10pm, I just can’t shake the feeling this is not normal for me.

I did suffer from insomnia years and years ago when I was having issues with anxiety and panic attacks but that has not plagued me for a good 5-6 years. It took a while to get it under control and get back on some sort of schedule and I am concerned it might be happening again. Not the anxiety or panic so much. But the insomnia/trouble sleeping/sleeplessness. I think I can kinda blame it a little on this site as well. And the stuff that is going on in my life right now. But still. I hate to think of it happening again.

The only other thing I can think of is the pain is keeping me up. I’m in a lot more pain then I let on to people around me. You know the feeling of pain and pressure you get when in an airplane (especially if you just had an ear infection or have ear issues)? Well I am getting that 24/7.

I noticed something else today. The insides of my ears feel swollen. I was feeling intense pressure in my right ear earlier so I – for whatever reason – stuck my finger in my ear a bit. Just like as if you have a hair that has gone in your ear and made it itchy and you need to fish it out. Doing this, I found the inside of my ear swollen, with a few little bumps like blisters in it. It really hurts.

When we decided to take Cory to the hospital earlier he asked if I was okay to drive. I have not driven in over a month and only drove a few times in the month before that. I had not up till that point experienced any vertigo, nausea, pain, etc. Plus I knew he would be in the car with me. At this point I figured he was worse off them me so I said yes. And I drove for the first time in over a month. And I did okay!

At the hospital however after sitting for a bit I had to pee and stood up. And just about went flat on my face. Thank god for things to grab onto. After that point I experienced it a few more times. I still drove home but made sure Cory was sitting up, talking to me and alert so if anything happened he could at least grab the wheel. I don’t want to drive again anytime soon. Am I being overly cautious? I just don’t know. But why take chances with my life or anybody else’s.

I’m just glad I have not got sick today at all, haven’t even really felt nauseous… yay for small blessings.

A bad case of food poisoning!

So I was woken up at 8am by Cory pretty much screaming my name. I went into the bathroom and he was pretty much doubled over in pain and pooping blood! Talk about scaring the shit out of me.

Last night we got hungry around 12am and decided to order from Alexandra’s a local pizza place. He got a donair sub and I got garlic fingers with bacon on them. Prior to that we both had spicy fries and Jane’s chicken fingers for lunch. Not very healthy I know… but that’s beside the point!

Anyways about an hour after eating the donair sub he was in the washroom and was there most of the night. By this morning it was just blood. He was terrified but at the same time was embarrassed I think to tell me. Eventually he did and I forced (not that it took much) him to go to the Emerg.

Since the donair sub was the only think that we did not have in common. Since I think they (donairs) are disgusting. If I wanted to eat a piece of leather on a pita bread I’d go eat a piece of leather on a pita. But anyways. It was the only thing it could have been and it corresponded to the pain and all that too well to be a coincidence.

We spent from 8am to 3pm in the hospital hoping like hell it was nothing more then food poisoning. Now I’ve had food poisoning before but I had never heard of it causing you to essentially poop blood, nothing else, just blood. Talk about scary.   All the stuff that went through my mind…

So now he is at home curled up on the couch with me here and watching Pawn Stars (love it!) and resting fairly comfortably right now. He is restricted to a clear liquid diet for 2-3 days which should be interesting, he’s a guy, they love food.

And I love you babe. So much.

New theme

There now I finally have a theme that I am happy with! I’m hoping to leave it up at least a month and maybe work on a few more themes that I can chose from later if I want. A theme a month maybe or a theme a season. Something like that.

In the meantime this theme is available for download on the themes page… Yay.