Do you enjoy growing old or do you fight against it?
I guess until recently I have always thought of age as just a number. I have never felt like I am getting older. Just living one day at a time and taking whatever life threw my way. I have always wanted kids and have always looked forward to getting older but never put much thought into it. I just figured it would happen one day and that there was always time.
Lately that philosophy has been coming back to haunt me a little. Sometime in the last year, I suddenly realized that I was substantially older (6 years) then my mother when she had me. All of a sudden I didn’t know where the time went and it has made me want to fight against growing older with all my might.
Before 30 I was really enjoying getting older and was looking forward to the things that come with it. Dating, finding my soul mate, buying my first new car, moving into a house, getting married and starting a family. I had no desire to fight it and was excited about growing older.
However somewhere between now and then things seemed to have gotten knocked off the course that I was expecting them to take and has left me feeling like I suddenly have to fight getting older. Even though I have found my soul mate. However I feel like everything else is all messed up and is in jeopardy of not happening. That scares me and makes me wish that I could freeze time for a bit. Does that count as fighting it?
Since I am really not all that old in the scheme of things I know that there is still time and sometimes things don’t happen as you expect them to. Actually I am beginning to realize that often things don’t happen as you expect them to but it is never to late to fight for what you want and if that means I am fighting against getting old, then so be it.