A Story About A Girl

Maybe moving wasn’t such a great idea…

Seems I have found another issue with our health system in rural Nova Scotia. I am not sure why I am surprised or if I am even really surprised, but had we stayed in Halifax at least I would likely have had access to counseling and/or to a psychologist. Here, however, there is no one. There appears to be no one taking on patients in Yarmouth, only one psychologist in Digby who is not returning calls and anyone in the Annapolis Valley, Middleton, Kentville or New Minas I called was either retired, semi-retired and/or not taking on patients. The community mental health and addictions program basically told me that they deal more with addictions and other things and don’t deal with PTSD or adjustment disorder type things and that if it was related to a car accident I would need to go through my car insurance or private health insurance and see a private doctor or counselor. [...]  READ MORE

So much for Christmas decorations

Image Credit: ErikaWittlieb from Pixabay

Honestly, though. I remember a post from 3 weeks ago mentioning how hard I was going to try this year to put up Christmas decorations and get in the spirit and that’s all gone to shit. My poor husband is currently trying to clean the house and all I can do is sit here and stare at either the computer screen or the TV. I have no energy, no that’s not the right word I have no motivation, no drive. As I am writing this Edward asked me if I want to walk to the store. Something I told him I wanted to do yesterday to get out of the house and get some fresh air.

I don’t want to go. I don’t want to leave the house. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t want to put up decorations. I feel like it’s already too late. Why bother? At the same time, it feels wrong. This all feels wrong. I love Christmas. Why do I feel this way? Why am I just sitting here crying my eyes out? Tomorrow, I have to go with my mom to Tiverton to decorate the hall for the dinner on Sunday. I don’t want to do it. [...]  READ MORE

It all came tumbling down

Image Credit: PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Trigger warning: This post could be triggering to some, please read with caution.

I am in a bit of a dark place right now. I am crying a bit as I write this but I need to get it out. I am really having a hard time right now. More so than I ever would have imagined. The car accident has really affected me in more ways then I could ever really have realized. I have become depressed, anxious and having panic attacks, all things that I really thought I had put behind me, that I had gotten under control and then even seemed to have pretty much disappeared. I have been doing so well, even through some pretty rough and tough times. I have been off medication years and not having many symptoms of anxiety and none of depression at all. [...]  READ MORE