Life’s what happen’s when your
busy making other plans

As John Lennon once said. I’ve been so busy typing that I have hardly had any time for anything else, including making any plan’s, so I would say the opposite applies here.  We’ve had so much work that there is little time for anything else, including taking the course for the job that I ended up having to turn down because I didn’t have the time to do the course for it. It was only going to be seasonal and part-time anyhow. I may try to take the tax preparation course later on my own time and next year try and prepare some tax returns for people on my own. It’s not like the job had any benefits anyways, minimum wage, no guarantee of hours, seasonal, no health or dental. All things I would need if I decided to make it my primary job.

Edward’s only found part-time work here at the moment, but there is a decent chance he can get full time sometime down the road as it’s a department store. Unfortunately since the job we moved down here for didn’t pan out it’s left me without health benefits for a year until his kicks in, at least he will have benefits being part-time as most part-time jobs don’t even have benefits. It’ll only be 50% coverage and not 80% as we currently have till the middle of next month, it’s left us in a bit of a pickle as my grandmother used to say. We have a year with no benefits and my medications and libre cost upwards of $350 a month. So, I’ve made an appointment next week with my family doctor to beg him to take me off insulin, which I only went on because we were trying to get pregnant and put me back on metformin or something else that is much cheaper and will save me the cost of the insulin pens and needles.

I am hoping we can swing the $89 every 2 weeks to keep getting the Libre sensors so I can keep a close eye on my blood sugar and that an oral medication will hopefully work and be cheaper. If not I really don’t know what we are going to do as paying for health and dental privately is super expensive when you have a pre-existing condition We didn’t think this would be an issue because my insurance was extended for 3 months and Edward’s was supposed to kick in in three months leaving us only a 2 week period in between with the other job and it was 80% as well.

Its kind left me worried and not sure what’s going to happen. I am sure my doctor is not going to be very thrilled with me at the moment, but he’s going to have to help me figure out a different solution because $300-350 a month is not something we can afford. I want off insulin anyways. I understand that eventually, I may end up going back on it but it was only supposed to be pre-pregnancy, pregnancy and a little bit after pregnancy anyways and then back to oral medications, so since pregnancy is pretty much out of the picture anyways I might as well see if he will consider another alternative for now.

Money is so tight right now and it’s stressful but I don’t regret the move here at all. To help with the finances Edward has started transcribing as well and he’s actually really good at it We both can type 49 wpm, his accuracy is about 95% and mine 97% so we are acutually really close. He just has to get used to listening and typing what he is hearing and the formatting but otherwise he is doing really good and it’s extra money for us. I think once we get everything ironed out it will still have been better for us in the long run, even if right now is a little bit rocky. I am sure we will get things sorted out and we will get back 100% on our feet again. I have plans. Plans that include, healthier eating, getting fit, losing weight, and hopefully reducing the number of medications I need or maybe reversing diabetes altogether, it’s probably rare but it’s possible with type 2 and I am determined to do it.

I plan to walk as much as I can, swim and skate. I want to start hiking again in the spring and maybe try softball or something. I would love to get on a softball or bowling team with my husband, he was all for us getting healthier and losing weight and eating better. I am not really good with healthy eating but I am going to make an appointment with the diabetic nutritionist in Annapolis and try and see if they can help me come up with some meal ideas and plans. There is so much I want us to start doing, but I have no idea how to put it into action, organization and planning has never been something I’m very good at, but right now I am looking up ideas online as I write this

Who really likes giving injections?

I know I certainly don’t. I don’t think any diabetic does, do they? Whether you have Type 1, Type 2 or Gestational Diabetes, if you need to take insulin you just do… don’t you?? You don’t act like a two-year-old, well unless you really are a two year old and scream and cry or pout or refuse, do you? Well… maybe you do? I know I sure feel like it sometimes. I literally want to lay down on the ground and have a full on temper tantrum and yell at my husband that he’s so mean when he tries to convince me that I need to. Sometimes times I want to be that petulant little toddler who stubbornly refuses to do as I’m told or as I know I should do. Why? Because it hurts… It just fucking hurts. There I said it.

Some of it is probably in my mind. So yeah, great now on top of being a temper tantrum throwing 2 year old, I’m crazy to boot. But am I? Nothing about diabetes is easy. It’s all a struggle. From counting carbs, assuming you do so, and I’ll admit, I really don’t. To testing your blood sugar. Thank you to the diabetes gods for inventing the Freestyle Libre, or no, maybe that was Abbott. To trying to eat healthy and in my case failing miserably. To getting exercise and losing weight, assuming your overweight. To trying to just understand the disease and control it. It just really really sucks sometimes.

I get overwhelmed by the fear of pain. It only lasts for a moment, even the burning sensation when it enters the skin. It’s definitely not the worst pain I have ever experienced. So why do I want to scream and cry and throw a temper tantrum? Just because I can… because in some little weird way, it makes me feel better, it makes me feel a little more in control… is that weird? I guess so, but I really don’t care. It’s not about wanting a pitty party. It’s not about making a scene. I just that I really don’t like giving injections. In the end, I usually do, but sometimes I chicken out and then feel like a fool. Am I the only one?? Probably not…

Working from home

We’ve been in Digby now for 2 full weeks, half way through our 3rd week. In this time Edward had not worked at all for the first two weeks. Department of fisheries stopped the boats from going out so there were no lobsters. He finally got a call Monday night he was working Tuesday. I drove him in at 6 a.m. to Digby to meet Dad and Denton at Tim Hortons. He worked from 7 a.m. to about 6 p.m. and I went back into town to meet them at Tim Horton’s again and then we were going to grab some groceries at the Superstore. We got groceries, got back in the car and got about 3 minutes down the road and I started to have issues breathing and felt like I was having an Asthma attack, something I haven’t really had much in years, just the occasional one. By the time we got home I was really having issues.

What neither of us considered in this whole thing is I am allergic to shell fish! Of all the things not to take into consideration, that had to be the worst one not to think of. We made it home, I didn’t have an inhaler but he did, so I took his. I made him strip out in the lean-to and throw his clothes right in the washer and I washed them twice. We talked it over and decided we couldn’t chance it as I have gone into anaphalactic shock before from eating shell fish. We just never considered the smell an issue or touch, just ingestion. I had heard of people reacting to the smell but never really experianced it myself. Only ever had issues if trying to eat it. On top of that he came home soaked and reeking of it. Needless to say he now has to look for another job. He’s frustrated and I feel for him he hates not working and not bringing in money for us. But we will survive, we just can’t chance it. On a good note though he has an interview at Walmart.

As for me I have been working exclusively from home transcribing and I have to say I love it! I really do. It gives me so much flexibility. I can sit and type for 2-3 hours, break for 30 minutes or so then type again. I can take a few hours anywhere in the day to run errands, clean up or do whatever I want. I can work 12 hours one day and 6 hours the next. I can take a day whenever I need it (as long as there is nothing that is a rush and needs to be done ASAP). I can get up, putter around, sit down, type, get up, move around and I can sit and type infront of the fire or the TV (or both ) I can work in PJ’s or sweats or get dressed and I don’t have to deal with customers on the phone or face to face and I can still make pretty close to what I was making in the city.

I still hope maybe to get hired on by the bank I was working for and still technically work for for the next 3 months at the local branch here in Digby but if I end up not getting on I may just continue working from home as long as Eddie finds a job with benefits. That’s my only real concern, that we have some kind of benefits to cover my insulin, needles, test strips and libre sensors but we could look into purchasing insurance. There are garenteed plans if needed in case neither of us has benefits but they cost a bit more, but we will figure it out.

I also signed up for a transcription work from home website and have done a few small things for them and got graded really high for the work. It’s not legal either so it’s like typing up video or other regular transcription type stuff. I really want to look into staying home and working especially if we plan to go ahead with our foster parenting plan and it pays okay, not as good as the work that I am doing for my mom’s business but it’s still decent and would help out if I need extra work or need a little extra money on top of what she is paying me. So I’m not too worried.

I’ve also been able to take an hour or two each evening before bed to read as well, which I am really happy and excited about. I have read about 4 books in the last two weeks and have a bunch more on hold through my local libraries through the app so that I can read them on my phone. I can’t wait to start a list of books I want to read. There is something so warm and comforting about stretching out on the couch in front of a warm fire on a cold winters night with a good ghost story or other book and reading by the light of the fire with a bowl of popcorn (or the occasional chocolate bar, yes being diabetic doesn’t mean I can’t treat myself once in a while) and to be able to do it every night. I feel like I am in heaven!

I would like to start walking a few times a week initally and then eventually every day as well. I want to get myself into a routine. Up by 6:30 to 7 a.m. get showered, dressed and start working by 7:30 to 8 a.m. until 1 or 2 p.m. with a 5-10 min break each hour or so to get up move around, load the dishwasher, sweep etc and then a hour or two in the afternoon to run chores, clean, cook or whatever. Then work from around 2 or 3 p.m. until about 5 or 6 p.m. then eat and maybe go for a walk then back working around 6:30 or 7 p.m. until about 9 or 10 p.m. and then relax until bed and watch TV or read or play cards, game, etc and just spend some time with Eddie.

Supper time and weekends will be family time, and we can have the occasionally night where I just don’t work after supper and we go out or something. It’ll be easier once he is working and I can kind of set it around his hours so that we can have some time in the evenings and on weekends/days off to have family time or dates etc. Money wise I think once he is working and I get into a routine it will not take long for us to start saving since we really owe nothing but the car and less then $1000 on our visa which I plan to pay off and just use the way we were last year and paying it off each statement.

I think this is going to be a lot better for us in the long run once we have it all figured out. As long as we can pay all our bills/rent and set some aside for savings each month I will be happy to live a simpler life here without all the extras we don’t really need or want that city life kind of pushes on you.