Ever wish you could go back and do something over? Like you screwed up so bad that nothing else matters. Not matter how good it is. A million good things can happen and you go and do one stupid thing and ruin it all. I know that sounds overly dramatic and more then likely it’ll look different at some point in time tomorrow or whenever. But I don’t really know at this point… All I know is I’m seriously crying and I feel like a fool. I should have realized what kinda of mood I was in and ended the conversation with him then and there. I could have said something like I was tired and was going to bed. Instead I probably look like a crazy ass person who no one in their right mind would want anything to do with. Why do I just have to sabotage anything that seems good. I’m scared I ruined any chance I’d ever have if there ever was one. I hope like hell I’m wrong. I really like this guy. I should be really really happy right now. Instead I’m going to bed with tears running down my face. Why the hell do I always do this to myself?